


A New Life

by terrahfry



Category: Hemlock Grove
Genre: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Bloodlust, Bottom Roman, Emotional Constipation, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Fluff, I put Olivia where she belonged, Lynda is a sweetheart, M/M, Masturbation, Original Character(s), Panic Attacks, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, Teasing, Top Peter, Violence, Virgin Roman, family fic, mentions of child abuse
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-25
Updated: 2019-06-24
Packaged: 2019-09-27 08:24:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17158601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/terrahfry/pseuds/terrahfry
Summary: After Olivia is sent to jail for the murder of Marie Godfrey years prior, Roman and Shelley are sent to live with Roman's biological father Norman, his new wife Lynda and her son Peter, and his half sister Letha. Roman's reluctant of his new family at first, feeling Lynda will eventually be cruel like Olivia had been, and gradually seeing that she's not.. That and he has some confusing feelings about his new 'stepbrother', who he begins to find fascinating and mysterious. Peter also has secrets. And there are things about Olivia and himself that Roman doesn't know yet.





	1. Strange Feelings

**Author's Note:**

> Some light teasing, mentions of physical and psychological child abuse.

Roman felt strange moving into a new house, complete with a new stepmom. He had lived at the Godfrey mansion his whole life, a whole sixteen years with his younger sister Shelley and their mother Olivia. Their father JR had shot himself when Roman was a kid, though he'd find out his biological father was his uncle Norman. With him is where he and his sister would be staying with his new wife, a woman by the name of Lynda, her son Peter and Roman's cousin/half sister Letha. The court had agreed to let Shelley stay with Roman even though Norman wasn't her biological father. Norman's former wife Marie had died two years earlier from suspicious circumstances. Recently it had been found out that his mother, still envious that another woman had Norman, had killed Marie in cold blood and she was arrested. Olivia had married into money, the Godfrey family was rich and ran the Godfrey Institute, and the steel mill before its closing. But the Godfrey money most likely will not save Olivia, and she awaits her fate while still locked up in prison.

Roman was kind of okay with that, as their mother had never been loving, choosing instead to be venomous and vile and sometimes outright abusive to him, and his sister, though he had always got the worst of it. She was a demanding and often cruel woman, wanting things to always be her way and going to any length, no matter how horrid, to get them. Roman would be happy if she were found guilty and would go away for a long time.

But it was still strange. He didn't know Lynda, or Peter, and felt maybe they had just married into money too. He didn't trust them. He avoided them at all costs, or tried to. He moved in Norman's, and busied himself with rearranging his room the way he wanted it. He wanted no part of a family, except for his sister Shelley, and his cousin Letha, who he saw as his only true family.

Norman had other ideas. He came into his room while he was unpacking to talk to him. "Look, Roman, I know it's been difficult.. We all need time to heal from everything she did, but it will get better."

Roman shook his head, letting out a huff. "Is that the way you see it? That it'll all just blow over and we'll be the perfect family?"

"We could be some day. Or maybe not perfect, but we could at least be okay. If you give it a chance." Norman's voice was hopeful.

Roman didn't want to give it a chance. "What do you know about this woman? The woman you replaced my aunt with."

"Roman, I am not your uncle. I'm sorry, but I'm not, so Marie wasn't your aunt." Norman told him gently.

"Yes, she was. For years she was." Roman argued.

"Until.." Norman sighed. Until Olivia murdered her, is what he didn't finish saying. He hadn't needed to say it out loud anyhow, they both knew what she had did.

"Hey, apparently you're the one who screwed my mother before I was born." Roman countered.

"It had been a drunken mistake, and I'm sorry. Just give Lynda a chance, okay. She's nothing like Olivia, you might even like her. She makes me happy." Norman admitted.

Roman had stilled. "Whatever. I'm not calling her mom and I'm not calling you dad."

"Fair enough. You don't have to, I won't force you." Norman assured him.

Roman oddly felt better about that.

\--xx--

Peter was another issue all together. He seemed to be getting too friendly with his cousin.. or his half sister, rather. Either way, Roman didn't like it, he didn't like him anywhere near Letha. Shelley seemed to like the shaggy dark haired boy as well, she also seemed to eat up Lynda's affections, but she was only thirteen and did not know any better. So far, the Rumanceks (now Godfreys?) tried to be nice, they paid attention to Shelley and seemed to like her company. Shelley was mute, she talked through a little device by typing out what she wanted to say with a stylus and a kind synthetic voice relayed the message out loud. She was often teased for this, but Peter or his mother never insulted her, they didn't treat her coldly like their mother had at all. They weren't like the bullies at school. Roman supposed he appreciated that. But still, he wasn't letting his guard down. Just because they didn't mistreat her now, didn't mean they couldn't start doing it later. Just because they weren't like Olivia, didn't mean they couldn't be.

Peter stood in the open doorway of Roman's room, startling him as he looked up and saw him in the reflection of his large stand up vanity mirror. He narrowed his eyes at the gypsy boy as Peter leaned against the door frame and smirked, arms folded.

"Hey.. so.. what'cha up to?" Peter asked.

"None of your business, Rumancek." Roman continued to adjust his clothes, checking his reflection and frowning.

"No, guess not. Why do you have one of those? Aren't they for girls?" Peter continued his smirk and Roman hated how his stomach flip-flopped at that. He had no earthly clue why it did, and he didn't want to question it.

"Some of us actually care about how we look. Not like others of us." He pointedly looked back at Peter in the mirror.

Peter shrugged. "Hey, it's cool. I like my style."

"You would." Roman huffed.

"Hey, I didn't fucking ask to be here anymore than you did. I don't know why you're being such a bitch to me." Peter said.

"I'm the bitch?" Roman asked, turning around.

"I said you were being one, yeah." Peter sighed. "I don't know what you have against me."

"Your mother only married my uncle for money." Roman spat out.

"She did not. He makes her happy." Peter shrugged. "And uncle..?"

Roman shook his head. Maybe he couldn't get use to not calling Norman his uncle. "It's a long story and I don't want to get into it."

"Oh, okay, I get it. But still, even if my mom married him for money, why be an ass to me? I haven't done anything to you." Peter pointed out.

"It's not like you aren't benefiting from it." Roman glared.

"Oh, yeah, cuz I'm obviously dripping in fine jewels." Peter looked down at himself as Roman looked him and his jewelry over, necklaces, bracelets and rings. "Okay, I am, but these are my own, and most of them were given to me as gifts before my mom even got with Norman, and some are flat out fake."

Roman smirked and snorted. He adjusted his tie and turned back to the mirror.

"What?" Peter shrugged.

"Nothing, that's just cute." Roman smiled.

"So you think I'm cute, huh? Well, now I see what the problem is." Peter teased in amusement.

Roman flushed and glared back at him in the mirror. "I didn't say you were cute. I said the thing you said was cute."

"Riiight, okay, Godfrey, whatever.. I'm not judging you." Peter then left, cackling as Roman snarled.

"Fuck you, Rumancek!"

"Maybe later!" Peter called back.

Roman growled in frustrated and just removed the tie a little more harshly than he needed to. It caused a red line across his neck and he rubbed at it. He didn't like this, he didn't like any of this. He hated it. He didn't exactly know why. Olivia was out of his and Shelley's lives now, hopefully for good, or at least until Shelley turned eighteen and she couldn't control either one of them anymore. He didn't miss her. He couldn't stand her. So this situation should seem a lot more preferable.. But for some reason, he just felt weird about it entirely.

\--xx--

He should give Lynda a chance, Roman later thought as he watched her help Shelley with her homework at the coffee table in the living room. Lynda sat up on the couch and Shelley had occupied the floor, using the coffee table as a desk. Lynda was polite and kind and didn't snap at or scold Shelley for getting answers wrong. She'd kindly tell her that they were wrong and help her fix the problem.

Still, every time Lynda would say "No, that's not right, sweetie. Here, let me help.." Roman would tense and brace himself for the worst. He'd anticipate her getting mean, yelling at Shelley or making some rude comment to her. He'd expect her to act like their mother would have.

Olivia would never even help Shelley with homework. If Shelley asked her, she'd get snapped at to not be so lazy and stupid. And if Roman asked, it was worse. If his report card was bad, it was worse. "I expect this from your sister since she's defective, but you? You should know better, you're not a idiot and you have no excuse for failing or getting it wrong." She would say. He didn't like to think about anything that followed.

Lynda noticed him staring off at nothing, most likely glimpsing into a memory only he could see. Roman was tense, breathing harsh. "Roman..?" She said as softly as she could, but Roman still flinched as if he had been burned and got up and stalked out of the living room. Lynda sighed, stroking Shelley's dark hair as the girl gazed up at her in questioning. She smiled kindly at her. "It's okay, sweetie. Let's move on to the next subject, okay?"

Shelley smiled and nodded, reaching into her bag to retrieve the proper book. Lynda's heart ached. She had saw it pretty quickly, these kids had been abused and tormented by that vile woman. Lynda hated to think about that. Roman hadn't been the most polite to her, and hadn't been well receiving of her kindness, but she could understand that. She didn't blame him, how could she? He had been through hell, and was only trying to protect himself.

Shelley had knew it too. She had saw what their mother put her brother through. If their mother had started on her for any reason, Roman would start with her to take the blow off of his sister and direct their mother's ire away from her. Too many times Shelley had seen him cry or tried to comfort him. Too many times she had seen and tried to tend to his bruises. But Lynda was nothing like that. Shelley could tell. She often always tried to see the good in people regardless, but even she could see that there was no good in their mother, Olivia Godfrey. They didn't get love or hugs, they got pushed away and berated for being weak. Olivia was never calm, nor patient, always loud and mean. Shelley hated to think such things of her mother, but she had been a monster.

\--xx--

Roman marched into the kitchen, he had to get away, had to get out. He had to run, run far from the memories. There was a voice that told him Lynda was nothing like his mother, and that he was being awful. But he still knew that she could start being like her. He didn't trust that she wouldn't start insulting them or hitting them.

"Double or nothing..?" Peter laughed as he sat at the kitchen table, playing cards out in front of him.

Norman sat across from him with his own cards. He stared at Peter's cards in disbelief. "You're sixteen, how are you so good at this?"

"My late grandfather taught me. We'd play for fun.. And for sticks and berries." He smirked. The last part hadn't been a joke. They would pretend they were currency instead of using money, just for fun. Though when Peter started getting good enough to beat his grandfather at their card games, he would start giving Peter gifts as rewards, just because he wanted to. That was how Peter got some of his jewelry, and it had a shit ton of sentimental value worth more than real money ever would be.

"That is amazing. When you're of age, we're definitely going to Vegas." Norman laughed.

Roman had watched them for a bit, feeling his heart twist. It felt as if he was missing something, and he didn't want that feeling.

"Roman, hey there." Norman said as he noticed him. "You okay, son?"

"I'm not your fucking son." Roman snapped.

Norman put his hands up in sort of a peaceful defensive gesture, letting what Roman said slide. "I didn't mean it like that, calm down."

Peter shuffled the cards. "Roman, you wanna play? I was just kicking Norman's ass here, maybe you can be a better opponent."

"Rude." Norman smiled.

"Yeah, I bet you let me win, huh, old man?" Peter chuckled, dealing out the cards. He even dealt out Roman cards without the boy answering about playing. "Sit down, pretty boy, so I can kick your ass too."

Roman just stared at him, wondering if he was serious, or if he had seriously lost his mind. "Why?"

"Cuz I said so. Sit." Peter continued.

"I mean why would you want to play with me?" Roman asked.

Peter shrugged. "I don't know, you're here.. Or do you even know how to play? I'm guessing you were never taught how." He was teasing, or trying to.

Roman narrowed his eyes. "Fuck you." He then turned and stalked back out.

Peter sighed. "I didn't mean to upset him.."

"It's okay, Peter.. It's just.. He's had a rough time.." Norman said.


	2. No Shortcuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman starts to see that Lynda may not be like Olivia, and the struggles with how Peter confuses him have just begun. After coming between Roman and some bullies at school, Peter tries to get to know him better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some suggestiveness, and homophobic bullshit from three awful bullies.

Watching Lynda help Shelley with her homework became a daily thing for Roman. He'd tell himself he was just keeping a watchful eye over his sister and making sure his fears of Lynda pulling an Olivia weren't happening.. But the more he watched, the more empty he began to feel.

Lynda smiled brightly. "Very good, Shelley, you're doing so well. You're such a smart girl."

Shelley smiled just as brightly up at her, beaming with pride. Their mother would have never complimented her like that. She'd claim it foolish, she'd always act like Shelley was a freak who had no right to ever be proud of herself for any little thing. Olivia never thought Shelley actually had a chance of doing anything productive with her life or would amount to anything. Roman didn't believe that about his sister, however. He saw how bright and wonderful she was. Maybe Lynda actually saw it too.

"Roman, do you need any help with yours?" Lynda suddenly asked, breaking Roman from his thoughts.

"No." He said curtly. "I'm good."

"Peter could help you, if you want." Lynda offered.

'If I don't want your help, what makes you think I want his?' Roman didn't say this out loud, however.

"Yeah, sure, I could help." Peter said from behind his chair, startling him.

Roman raised up and looked back, glaring at the gypsy boy behind him. "I said I'm good. I don't need any help."

Peter shrugged. "Nonsense, everybody needs a little help every now and then." Peter said, dragging ringed fingers along the back of the chair and across the arm of it as he walked around it. "Come on, we'll go in the kitchen."

Roman's eyes narrowed. "No."

"Yeah, come on." Peter gave a coy smirk and headed on in the way of the kitchen, as if Roman was just supposed to follow him.

"No." Roman tried more firmly and stubbornly.

He was only met with another easy-going "come on.."

Roman huffed, got up with a roll of his eyes, and followed Peter into the kitchen anyhow. He hadn't wanted to. But maybe he could get some amusement out of it.

Peter showed him shortcuts to problems he had never seen before. "You see, it's much easier to do it this way."

"Isn't that cheating..?" Roman asked as they sat at the kitchen table.

"Nah. It's just another way of doing it. It's just another way of solving a problem, you still get the same result as the hard way, it's still correct." Peter contended.

"There are no shortcuts in life." Roman repeated the old saying bitterly.

"Yes, there is. And that isn't always bad. And you just gotta know how to find them. See, what I did was figure out an alternative way of solving a difficult problem." Peter shrugged, raking fingers through his shaggy dark hair and shaking it a bit.

"A lazy way." Roman argued, glaring hard at the other boy.

"A smarter and more creative way. Think outside the box, dude." Peter smirked, and Roman hated when he did that. He hated the confusing way it made him feel, queasy and questioning. "I mean, it doesn't work for everything, fuck no. There's still so much you gotta work hard at. But let's say if you could find a shorter easier way of, like, mowing the lawn.. wouldn't you take it? Well, I guess you've never mowed the lawn, but still.." He noticed Roman's glare. "I don't mean to assume you've never, uh.." Peter blinked, looking like he had realized he had stuck his foot in his mouth, and that was amusing to Roman.

"We had people for that." Roman glowered, look then softening a bit. He shrugged, tiny smirk tugging at his lips that he refused to let Peter see. "I never had to."

"Well, I do occasionally mow the damn lawn, and if I had a shortcut to make it easier and still get it done right, I would fucking take it." Peter said.

"My mom always said-" Roman was cut off.

"Your mom? Let me tell you something about your mom, though you probably already know it. Your mom was the fucking champion of taking the easy way. She the one who told there were no shortcuts in life? Cuz she took a major shortcut when she married your daddy for his fortune. I'm not judging her for that shit, hell, I wasn't even alive to know her back then. All I'm saying is, she has no fucking room to talk. She had no right to tell you that shit." Peter licked his lips.

Roman sat a little stunned. He honestly wanted to applaud him for saying that. It's not like he believed in or approved of everything she said or did, it was all just pounded so deep into his brain that it was hard to forget and let it go. He blinked and looked down at his homework paper. "She was a cunt anyway."

"Well, I wasn't going to go that far, but.." Peter trailed off deliberately.

"No, she really was. I know. You're right." His eyes searched the paper. Peter was smart, and unique, though Roman would not dare say that out loud to the boy or anyone else.

Peter nodded, scooting his chair closer to Roman's to the other boy's irritation. "Okay, then let me show you some other ways of doing things." The gypsy grinned. "I mean the problems, of course." He said when Roman glared up and over at him from where he slouched over the homework laid out on the table. "Or whatever you want me to show you." He wet his lips.

"Let's stick to the homework." Roman said.

Peter shrugged again and pulled back a bit. "Suit yourself."

\--xx--

Of course going to school was now a nightmare for Roman. His mother was a monster, so there was that. She was a psycho, and even though Roman had done nothing wrong, and had no part in his aunt's murder or knowledge of it at the time it happened, he was unofficially branded a psycho by association. And wasn't that just a bitch? Roman shouldn't have to pay for what she did. He liked his aunt, and he would have never hurt Letha by taking her mom away. Also Marie wasn't a horrid wretched person like Olivia was, she didn't deserve to be snuffed out so cruelly.

The looks he got from students who knew, or thought they knew the whole story, was glaringly suspicious and judgemental. He had never had friends before all this, and he didn't really care.. But at least back then, they mostly left him alone. Not anymore.

Roman found himself yet again cornered and shoved up against some lockers in the hallway. A jock asshole by the name of Seth Mosley had an arm across his chest, holding him there and smirking at him as he taunted him. He didn't like this guy.. Nobody liked this guy except for his goons Dirk Simmons and Jesse Tate. It wasn't unlike any other time. Seth mocked him, calling him names, talking about his mother and what a whore she was- like Roman gave a shit there.

"Hey, pretty boy.. Where the fuck do you think you're going in my fucking hallways? You need the password to come through. Do you have the password, Godfrey?" Seth smirked, tightening his fingers into where they clenched onto Roman's shirt. He leaned in way too close for Roman's comfort, getting right in his face. "Or maybe you could pay a little penalty and I'll let you pass."

Being the damn sheep that they were, Dirk and Jesse only cackled and egged him on.

"You know, I used to fuck your mom before she was caught. I wonder if your pussy's as hot and wet as hers. You know, you wouldn't do too well in prison, Godfrey. They'd take one fucking look at those pretty lips and you'd be on your knees every day. Bet you'd like that, huh? Bet you're a big a whore as your mother was."

Roman continued to stare past Seth and his goons, not meeting their gaze or giving into their bullshit to say or do anything. He'd wonder where the hell were the teachers, but like they'd give a shit if they were here.

Seth grabbed his face with his free hand and tightened his fingers into his cheeks, forcing his head towards him. Roman still stared blankly, not focusing on him.

"Look at me, you psycho bitch. You're gonna pay the penalty for coming through my fucking hall. How 'bout I bloody that pretty little mouth before I use it?" Seth then laughed at him and released his face to draw back like he was ready to hit him.

"Hey, leave him the hell alone." That was Peter, which was fucking great, Roman thought sarcastically.

Seth backed away from Roman to glare at the intruder. "Or what?" He then looked back to Roman. "How sweet, your little boyfriend come to save you?"

This received mocking "awww"s from Dirk and Jesse. What loser assholes.

Roman didn't want to dignify that with a response. He didn't even roll his eyes like he wanted to.

Seth laughed. "Is he this exciting in bed, Rumancek? Maybe he just needs the right man to make him squeal and squirm."

"Yeah, bet you'd love to find out, huh? Let him go and leave him the fuck alone." Peter growled.

Mocking "ooh"s followed from all three bullies. Seth still grinned. "Really, Godfrey, he actually your fucking boyfriend? Thought you could do better. I mean.. him..?" He nodded back toward Peter as he kept a predatory gaze locked on Roman.

The other two were stunned when Peter grabbed Seth by the jacket and swung him around to hold him against the lockers. "And so fucking what if I am? Homophobia is a condition that just shows how ignorant the conflicted is."

Dirk and Jesse made a motion to attack, but Seth held his hand out to call them off for now. "A filthy gypsy and a faggot."

Peter smiled. "Yeah, how about that..? But trust me, you don't want to fucking mess with me.. Or do you?" The smile turned into a grin that garnered a disgusted look from Seth.

"Ah, to hell with you and your psycho bitch boyfriend. I'll get you when you least expect it." Seth shoved Peter off of him and stalked away, Dirk and Jesse on his heels.

"Hm, should I look forward to it?" Peter blew him kisses as he and his goons left.

"You wish, fag." Seth called, flipping him off.

"No, I really fucking don't. I could do better." Peter laughed. When he looked at Roman, he saw that the boy was kind of hugging himself and staring at him. "Whoa, do you always have that creepy stare? I mean, do you give it to everyone, or am I just fucking special?"

Roman picked up his bookbag from where he had dropped it to the floor in front of the lockers and continued to stare at Peter as he walked on by him.

"Okay.. You're welcome, by the way.." Peter said, following him.

"I never asked for your damn help." Roman stated.

"Yeah, but you looked in need of a White Knight. That, and I don't like bullies. Fucking morons. You're with me now, kid." Peter wrapped an arm around his shoulders and Roman froze.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Roman shrugged him off.

Peter just shrugged. "Asserting my dominance..?" He grinned wryly.

"Don't touch me." Roman continued on to his class.

Peter followed. "Okay, okay, sorry. You have boundaries, I respect that shit. Personal space and whatever, it's cool."

\--xx--

Later Peter sat with him at lunch, just invited himself to plop down beside him, with or without Roman's consent. "So, what's the story with those guys?"

"They're just stupid jocks." Roman replied dully, picking at what qualified as green beans on his tray.

"Why were they picking on you then? Shouldn't you be Mister Popularity or some shit?" Peter asked.

"I don't have friends." Roman sighed.

"Why?" Peter lifted some of the green beans up to his nose on the fork and sniffed at it before shoving it into his mouth.

"Why do you ask so many questions?" Roman stared over at him.

Peter merely shrugged. "To get to know you better. Is that a crime?" He smirked coyly.

"Maybe it should be.." Roman muttered.

"Haha.." Peter said dryly. "No, I just figured we're going to be living under the same roof, might as well get to know you."

"Like you've been getting to know Letha?" Roman shot back.

"Well, yeah. And Shelley, and Norman.." Peter seemed confused. "It's not sinister, I promise."

"You don't want to know me." Roman's gaze went back to his tray.

"Yeah, I do." Peter argued.

"Why?" Roman asked.

"Cuz.."

Roman groaned and considered getting up and going to sit at a different table. "You don't need to."

"Eh, whatever, I do lots of shit I don't need to do." Peter grinned. "So, the jocks..?"

"Seth, Dirk and Jesse. Royal assholes who think they run this school and this town." Roman sighed.

"So, why bother you?" Peter inquired.

"My mother's a fucking psychopath, for one." Roman said.

"So? You're not your mother." Peter pointed out.

Roman managed a hint of a smile then. "Thanks. Nicest thing I've heard all day." He said it sarcastically, but actually meant it seriously. "Seth hasn't been so kind to me since I turned him down a couple of months ago."

"Hm.. He doesn't strike me as the type, seemed like a homophobic dickhead to me." Peter observed.

"He is.. He didn't want it advertised or anything.. Just wanted to fuck in secret. Wanted to use me. I'm not into him that way.. or any way.." Roman divulged.

"I don't blame you." Peter nodded.

"Everyone wants to fuck the rich boy.." Roman shook his head.

"Has anyone got to..?" Peter asked absently before thinking.

"That's none of your damn business." Roman snapped.

"Fuck, okay, okay, you're right.. it isn't.. Shit.. sorry.. Um.. just so you know, I don't care that you're rich, I don't want your fucking money." Peter said.

"I'm sorry, Peter, I just don't believe that yet." Roman replied.

"Look, there are reasons my mom married your dad, and it isn't-"

"Norman is not my dad!" Roman glared up at him. "For years he wasn't! My dad is dead. And for some asshole to tell me that he wasn't my real dad, that his brother, my uncle is.. it's just bullshit."

"Sorry, you're right, it is.." Peter agreed.

"He couldn't man up back then and say he was my father and take responsibility, no, he chose not to." Roman ranted. "He had a perfect little wife and daughter of his own, he didn't want to ruin that with me. He didn't want to break up his happy home."

"He probably didn't also want to break up yours. He didn't want to do that to his brother and your mom. I don't know, it wasn't right, it's shit, but he's trying now to rectify it. He didn't let you and Shells be in foster care." Peter told him.

"Don't defend him. Just cuz you're buddy-buddy with him and play cards doesn't give you that right." Roman snapped.

"I'm not defending his actions, Roman, I'm just saying.. He did some shitty things, but he had reasons." Peter said.

"No, cuz after my father died, Norman could have stepped up, but he still didn't want to break up his perfect little family. He didn't want my mom? Fine, I don't fucking blame him. But he didn't want me either. He doesn't get a pass for that." Roman got his tray and got up, stalking away from the table.

Peter sighed, stabbing the meat on his tray with a fork and lifting it up to take a bite out of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter's trying... Okay, I've decided that Peter will be a werewolf after all, and Roman will be half upir cuz I want him to deal with it minus Olivia. I'm still figuring this one out. Seth and his goons are my awful creations, created especially to be unsavory and unlikable bad guys, generic bullies. They first appeared in Unexpected. Seth usually thinks Roman is his, but he's full of shit. I don't condone homophobic bullshit and I hate it.


	3. Mundane Angst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman and Peter both wake up from different dreams and have different reactions. Peter struggles with his little crush and takes to avoiding Roman, while Roman takes to watching Peter. Roman also has a bloody secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for self-harm. Roman self-harming and having a bloodlust was canon to the series, but even still it's a difficult subject. Of course, Roman isn't exactly normal, he's half upir and it's apart of his genetic makeup. I want to play with this more and have him deal with it. Also, mentions of Olivia's abuse.

Roman woke up in a cold sweat, gasping and sitting up in bed. He gazed around the darkened room, reminding himself of where he was. 'She's in jail, the bitch is in jail,' he told himself. It was still night and dark out, the clock displaying 3:30am. The nightmare had been bad, as they often were. Even though Olivia was locked up and out of his life for the time being, he still couldn't escape her when he slept, like she was some kind of even more twisted, evil and heartless Freddy Krueger. Of course, he couldn't just tell himself it had just been a bad dream, when it had been a bad memory.

Roman pushed the covers back and rubbed his eyes with both hands before pushing his hair back. He could hear the voices now, and they all sounded like Olivia. 'Pathetic', 'weak', 'useless', 'it's for your own good, Roman, you're too soft', 'I only do this because I love you.'

Roman fought off the tears, tears he would have been berated and insulted for had she ever saw them. And she had saw them, especially when he was younger, and it never fared well for him if he let her see them. 'Stop being such a baby, only babies cry, you are an emperor', 'stop crying or you'll get it worse, I'll give you something to cry about.' She wasn't kind and compassionate, or remorseful. No, she got even madder and meaner. So, Roman choked it all back, refusing to cry. Instead, he swung his legs over the side of the bed and leaned over to dig through the nightstand drawer beside his bed. He retrieved a small box and opened it with shaky hands, fingers grasping the razor blade and bringing it out to stare at it.

His heart pounded in his ears. Just one small cut, and the voices would stop, the emotional bullshit he didn't need would stop. Just one more, just this one time. He turned the blade over between his fingers, the voices begging him to do it again. One more time was never enough. Last time it had been just 'one more time' as well.

He made the cut across his upper thigh, pressing the sharp end of the blade hard against his flesh and moving it to slice the skin open, watching as it bled. He hadn't made it too long or too deep. For a second, he was numb and the voices stopped. He liked the pain, the sting of it. If anyone knew, they might think he really was as psycho as his mother and lock him away too. No one could know about his sickness. He liked it, it felt somehow morbidly natural, even though it shouldn't. It wasn't natural, it wasn't normal, or acceptable, he knew this.

He ran his fingers through the blood, smearing it on his pale flesh and making circles in it with his finger. He lifted his bloody fingers to his lips and rubbed the rich red liquid over them as if it were lipgloss. He licked his lips, his tongue gathering the blood before curling it back into his mouth to swallow. He licked his lips again before sucking his bloody fingers into his mouth to lick all the blood off of them. He then repeated the whole process. This was the even more twisted part, how he liked the taste.

From the very first time he had done this, he had to taste it. He could smell it and just had to have a taste. The appeal of it was overwhelming and he had stopped fighting the urge to do it long ago. It was better than crying, he'd tell himself. But yet, he felt so empty and regretful afterwards. He'd have to clean it up and go through the shit of hiding it. No one could see it. No one could know he did this. This was apart of him, and he hated this about himself. He knew there was something wrong with him and no one would understand.

What would his mother have done if she ever caught him? 'You like blood so much, I'll make you bleed.'

Roman felt horrified for a moment as he continued to suck the blood off his fingers. He removed them from his mouth and still felt like crying. He put the razor back into the box and placed it back into his drawer before closing it.

He then got up and went to the bathroom on autopilot. The great thing about this room was he had his own private bathroom inside the room. He cleaned the cut and bandaged it before returning to bed, able to feel the sting of the cut as his flesh tightened with every movement. He doubted he'd be able to sleep anymore at first. But thankfully it was the weekend, and he had fallen back out by dawn from exhaustion. Maybe they would let him sleep until noon.

\--xx--

Peter woke up in a cold sweat for entirely different reasons. His heart pounded and he panted. He tossed off the covers and raked his sweaty hair back with his fingers before getting up out of bed and dragging himself to the window. He opened the curtains and stared up at the moon, glowing bright and huge, even though it wasn't fully full yet. The closer he got, the more restless he became, something clawing beneath his surface, dying to be set free. He stretched and then cracked his neck, lifting and splaying his fingers to stretch and wiggle them. He ached all over.

Peter swallowed painfully and went to his bathroom to turn on the sink facet and catch some water in his hands to lift up and drink out of them. He then washed his face and turned off the facet, grabbing a towel to dry off.

The dream came flooding back and he flushed. It wasn't unusual for him to chase prey in the woods in his dreams, stalk them and catch them.. But this time the prey had been much larger and.. human..

He had captured him easily. Stalked him and chased him. The boy had no fucking business following him into the woods at night, the moon full and bright and hypnotic. 'Peter..?' He still heard his voice, clear as day. The boy had startled when he heard the noise of footsteps in leaves and the growl that followed and began running.

Peter shut his eyes tight, hunched over the sink and refusing to meet his gaze in the mirror reflection, or unable to. He grabbed tight to the granite vanity, the pads of his fingertips squeaking against it.

He captured Roman in the dream so easily. Pinned him down in the wet leaves and dirt, struggling and toying with him. 'Peter?!' A strained whimper escaped him as his clothes were literally torn off in shreds. 'Please..'

What was he begging for? For Peter to stop? For more? To keep going? Had to be the latter since a very human Peter was raking too-long nails down his chest and Roman didn't oppose or struggle anymore. He had stopped when he saw it was just Peter.. Not some animal. If he had been pleading for him to stop, Peter would have stopped. He wasn't that kind of monster.

Roman had also looked terrified though, pale skin flushed in the moonlight. His eyes were blown wide, dark and shining. Full, plump lips parted as he panted. Peter wanted to kiss them, but leaned down and buried his face in his neck as he rutted against him. He was hot, so fucking hot and gone. He was aching and hard and just wanted to bury himself in the other boy and stay there until he was completely fucking spent and empty and had no more. But instead he felt the familiar pops and cracks along his spine and felt the primal growl rip from his throat as Roman screamed. He woke up before anything else happened, before he even got to be inside him. Dreams were such bullshit.

He had felt strange since getting his first whiff of Roman. Sure, the boy was pretty, but this was ridiculous. He felt like tearing Seth's head off for being so close, pinning him to the lockers and making him uncomfortable. He had shaken off the notion that Seth and his idiot friends had been in his territory. Of course, Peter would never force him. He wasn't that kind of monster. And of course, Peter had always been protective of his family; of his mother and his cousin Destiny. And now of Letha and Shelley, and even Norman and Roman.. But with Roman, it felt different. He was so fucking screwed, and not in the good way.

He went back to bed and jerked off under the covers, finishing the dream in his fantasies and not giving a shit about the mess he made.

\--xx--

Peter seemed to avoid him the next day. Which, should relieve him, but just made Roman feel weird about it. They had allowed him to sleep until noon, and didn't say anything when he dragged himself into the kitchen at 1pm. Peter took one quick glance at him, then averted his gaze, only muttering a hurried "good afternoon" before leaving the kitchen. Roman didn't have the energy to think about what the fuck was wrong with the gypsy, he had his own worries. He could feel the sting that every move of his skin under the bandage made on the cut. It was at least a distraction.

He sat down at the table across from his sister with a wince. Shelley looked at him concerned and he hoped she didn't say anything.

Of course, she did anyway. "You said you wouldn't do that again." The synthetic voice scolded.

Roman flinched and stared at her. "I.. I just slept the wrong way, is all. I promise."

Shelley glared at him, not liking being lied to. "Don't lie to me." She typed out a little harder than necessary.

"I'm not, okay? I'm fine, really." He said.

Sometimes he couldn't believe how smart and intuitive she was. She didn't believe him, and shook her head, the disappointment and irritation showing on her face. He had always tried to keep it from her, but she had found out when she walked in on him one day a few months ago. She had cried and was angry with him, but she never told anyone and she didn't view him any differently. He'd always promise he'd never do it again, but it was always the biggest lie he ever told her.

"I hate when mom hurts you." Shelley typed out. "I hate when you hurt you too." She typed out more. "Stop." She got up and headed out of the kitchen.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Please don't be upset." Roman replied.

Shelley stopped and turned, look softening. She shook her head and wrapped her arms around her brother's neck to hug him. He hugged her back for a moment before she was nuzzling his head with hers and pulling away to leave the kitchen.

A part of the regret of his actions was Shelley being upset at him. It was only because she cared about him. If no one else in the world cared, Shelley and Letha did. Of course Letha didn't know about the self-harm.

Roman gazed down to his thigh where the bandaged cut lay hidden beneath his clothes, staring at the spot as if he could see it through his pants. He moved his hand up to press fingers against it to make it ache, digging them down into it hard.

Peter was in the living room with Shelley when Roman came in and sat down in the chair. Roman noticed that his sister was sitting in the floor and was watching some show on tv geared for teens, munching on a bag of chips, and for once looking like a normal kid. Their mother didn't allow her to watch mindless television, or have junk food, even if Roman would sneak and let her any time that the bitch was out of the house. Roman flinched slightly when Norman walked in and sat down on the couch behind her.

He irrationally felt he was about to bitch about what Shelley was doing when he said, "Hey, kiddo, what're you watching?"

Shelley stopped eating long enough to tell him what the show was, along with giving him some tidbits about the show.

"Hm, don't think I've ever heard of this one. That's mainly Letha's thing, she usually steals my tv to watch that one show that comes on Thursday about the two hunters and their pet angel that kill demons. She thinks they're cute and badass." He said in amusement.

"I love that show." Shelley typed out. "Mom hates me watching it." She added.

"Well, you can watch it with her this Thursday, I don't mind. She won't mind." Norman told her.

Shelley smiled and typed out, "Awesome." She went back to her chips.

Roman had never heard her ever use that word, their mother would scold her for it, claim it ignorant for using such delinquent phrases, she'd tell them that they were not delinquents and they were not going to talk like them. Roman felt weird about all of it, but not because he thought that this change was wrong for Shelley. It was benefiting his sister for the better. She deserved to be able to be a normal kid, and then be a normal teenager. She was also young enough to be able to let her guard down and realize that not everyone was like their mother. Roman was still having a hard time with that. He kept waiting for another shoe to drop or something.

Roman also briefly caught himself trying to smile while watching his sister. Peter gave him another short glance and jerked his gaze back away. Roman had noticed that too. He didn't know what Peter's fucking problem was. Roman thought that maybe it was because of how he had acted yesterday. Roman felt a little bit bad about that now. Peter had just been trying to help and then get to know him, and Roman hadn't appreciated it. After school Roman gave him the cold shoulder for the rest of the night. Maybe Peter was realizing how much of a lost cause being Roman's friend was and was just going to give up. Good, Roman thought, he needed to. He needed to, and yet, Roman didn't know how he felt about Peter actually deciding to avoid him. It felt strange. It felt that way, because maybe Roman didn't want it and he didn't know why.

"Hey, Peter, wanna help me mow the lawn today? It really needs it. I'll pay you." Norman offered.

Peter had been watching Roman out of the corner of his eye. The other boy was subconsciously nibbling on his bottom lip. He had his elbow propped up on the chair arm and brought his hand to his mouth to capture the tip of his thumb between his teeth. The dream hadn't left him. Okay, so he was attracted to him. But it didn't matter and Peter didn't have to worry about it because Roman didn't even like him or want him around, the thought of ever doing anything with Roman was a lost cause. And wow, that didn't ease his mind about his little crush on Roman at all, it just made it suck.

Roman turned his gaze to Peter as Norman called his name again, thinking he hadn't heard him.

Peter straightened up and nodded. "Yeah, I heard you, I'll mow the lawn, no big deal." He then hastily left the living room.

Roman thought he was acting odd. Peter hadn't been this off since they moved here. Peter was always jovial and attentive. Today, it was like he was off in his own little world.

"Wait, I was.." Norman had cut himself off and stood up. "Enjoy your show, kiddo. I'm gonna go help him." He told Shelley as he followed Peter out.

Letha came in at that moment and took a seat on the couch, sighing. "Finally done. Don't take extra assignments from Mrs. Sanders." She laughed. "Oh, I love this one." She said of the show.

"Why did you?" Roman asked.

"I needed the extra credit. It just took me longer to do the work than I thought. Some of us actually want to get into a good college." She teased, tossing a pillow off the couch at Roman, who caught it.

"I'm sure we'll be able to on namesake alone." Roman sighed.

"Yeah, but I don't want to get in because of our last name. I'm gonna earn it." Letha smiled proudly.

"You still have a few years to work on that, I wouldn't worry too hard about it." Roman said, continuing to bite on his thumb.

"Three years." Letha said. She was in tenth grade and school had just started like a month ago. It wasn't even cold outside yet. Roman was in eleventh grade. They both were sixteen, but since Roman and Peter were a few months older than her, they were in a higher grade. Or however the fuck that worked.

"Yeah, but you're smart and shit, you'll do fine." Roman sighed again.

"I'm 'smart and shit.' Thanks." She smiled.

"Yeah, yeah.." Roman muttered sarcastically. They were just teasing each other. This felt normal, but his mind was still on too much other shit to enjoy it. He got up and headed out of the room. He would've liked to spend more time with Shelly and Letha, but just told himself he was sick of that stupid show.

"Norman said you'd watch Supernatural with me." Shelley typed out.

"Sure. You like Supernatural? I love that show. It's so good, uhm.." Letha practically purred.

Roman shook his head and wandered through to the kitchen to peer out the window into the backyard. Norman was out there with Peter, who was struggling to start the lawnmower. Roman watched him lean over it and tug the cord again and again. He already looked frazzled and reached up to wipe sweat from his brow before trying again. It was warm today for sure.

Peter also seemed to be cursing it and kicked at it with his shoe. Not exactly kicking it hard, but nudging it in frustration. It made Roman snort and give a chuckle. It was cute. And he hated himself for thinking that that was cute. Norman even gave it a try or two as Peter scratched at his shaggy mess of dark hair. He actually managed to get it started.

Peter did most of the mowing, and Roman continued to watch out of boredom like a curious Peeping Tom. He didn't know why he was watching, and almost felt like he was spying like a jerk. Peter had also taken his shirt off. Roman swallowed as he tiptoed a bit over the sink to gaze out the window in trying to get a better view. He could already see the muscle definition in the gypsy's body, and the patch of hair on his chest with beads of sweat clinging to both. Roman tried not to dwell on that as he nibbled on his fingers, not exactly biting his nails. He had stopped biting his nails long ago, his mother had made sure of it. It was a nasty habit, but she didn't have to be so passionate about him not doing it.

"What're you doing, sweetie?" Lynda asked, startling him and making him move back from the sink. It was like he was caught watching something he shouldn't have been, which was silly since he was only observing them mowing the lawn. Though he probably really was an asshole for spying. Though, really, he was just simply caught looking.

"They're mowing the lawn." Roman told her.

Lynda gazed out and smiled, waving at Peter as he looked her way. "Oh, that's nice. You wanna help me with the dishes so I can get dinner started?" She asked, smiling kindly at him.

No, he didnt. "I got homework to do." He replied vaguely and headed off to his room.

"Oh, well, okay. That's certainly more important than the dishes." She nodded.

Letha came in to grab a drink as Roman left. "I'll help. He doesn't do dishes. Or anything." She shook her head fondly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comparing Olivia to Freddy Krueger isn't really fair to Freddy Krueger. Both of these boys, I swear. I don't know how old Letha was, I assumed it was the same age as Roman and Peter, but I didn't pay much attention since I didn't care for Letha or their weird incestuous storyline. So I made her the same age and slightly younger in a different grade. I have a cousin/half brother too that was six months older than me and was in a higher grade. As I've said above, I want to have Roman deal with his self-harm and bloodlust issues, but it is a sensitive subject and I'm trying to approach it as so, especially since I have past experience with it. I also have past experience with child abuse, and that's more sensitive to me personally and hard to deal with. Supernatural is my favorite show, ajs sometimes I like having characters mention it. This site put up the second chapter when I updated it on March 5, but still said it hadn't been updated since December 25, 2018. I don't know what happened, so I deleted it and reposted it.


	4. Reasons to Panic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman still struggles with his feelings about the newcomers, and one wrong word from Peter triggers a slight panic attack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The usual theme. Angst. Panic Attacks.

Roman had no homework to do. He had lied to Lynda. Lying to Olivia never fared well for him, so he wondered how it would be with Lynda. It was sort of like his own little test. So instead he just went back to watch crappy tv with Shelley.

Lynda had came back into the living room awhile later and found him sitting back in the chair he had seemed to claim as his own. "I thought you had homework to do, sweetie?"

"I finished it." He replied, not looking at her.

"Oh.. And you wouldn't be lying to me, now would you?" Lynda asked, wiping her hands on a dish towel.

Roman flinched a bit and slumped down into his chair, appearing to attempt to make himself smaller. Maybe if he tried hard enough, she wouldn't see him.. This never worked, however. He couldn't even make eye contact with her with as pathetic as that was. It seemed rude, it was rude, but there was this nauseous feeling growing in the pit of his stomach that didn't give a shit.

"It's alright, sweetie. But all you had to say was that you didn't want to do the dishes. I most certainly understand." She chuckled good-naturedly. "Dinner will be ready in about an hour." She then headed back to the kitchen.

Roman finally gazed in the direction that she had left and felt a confusing relief. When he glanced back, he noticed Shelley was glaring at him a bit.

He shrugged. "What? No one likes doing dishes."

"You shouldn't lie to her." Shelley typed. "It isn't fair." She wasn't mad at her brother, and she understood how he felt, but she also felt that he really wasn't being fair to the woman who had been so kind to them. She felt Lynda at least deserved a chance.

"Shelley, she isn't our mother." Roman replied.

"No. She definitely is not." Shelley typed. "Not at all."

Roman sighed. "I'm sorry, Shells, it's just been a bad couple of days is all. The nightmares are back."

Shelley softened. "I'm sorry."

Roman shook his head and looked down. "It's not your fault."

"She's not like Mother." Shelley told him.

"How do you know that she isn't going to start being like her though? She could." Roman whispered in case he was heard by anyone except his sister. Roman felt his sister was being too trusting and naive about people that had just popped into their lives, people that they knew nothing about.

"I just know." Shelley typed. "She won't." And then. "Trust me."

"It's not you I don't trust." Roman said.

"Is it because they are gypsy?" Shelley asked. "Mom always said gypsy was bad." She added as Roman rolled his eyes.

Roman shook his head. "No, Shelley."

"She pounded it into our heads." Shelley continued. "But I don't believe she's right."

"It's not that, Shelley. I don't care about that." Roman sighed. "And there was a lot that Mom wasn't right about."

"I know." Shelley dropped it then and went back to her tv.

Roman felt bad then. Was that the real reason why he was treating them so coldly, because Olivia had pounded it into his head that 'their kind' was bad? No.. he didn't believe her about that. He didn't want to. He didn't think the Rumanceks were particularly bad at all.. he just didn't trust them right now. It wasn't because they were gypsies or nomadic, that had nothing to do with it, because plenty of non-gypsies married into money and swindled people and used them all the time. It was simply because they were strangers who were new to his life and he didn't know them very well yet. Though, he probably wasn't making much of an effort to know them. He was just afraid, even if he didn't want to admit that out loud. Roman would admit that he wasn't like his mother, he didn't want to be like her. Shelley was right though, he wasn't being fair, even if he had his reasons. Even if he was just merely being cautious.

Roman sighed for the hundredth time and got up, heading to the kitchen.

Lynda looked up and over at him as she was leaning down to put something into the oven. "Hey..? Everything okay?" She asked, shutting the oven.

Roman twisted the ring on his right hand's ring finger out of nervous habit. It had been his father's and he always wore it. "Yeah.. uh.. I'm.. uh.. I'm sorry I lied to you." He gazed up at her and took a breath. "It was wrong.. It's just.. what she'd do to me if I lied.. and I wondered.. if you.." He swallowed, not wanting to continue or elaborate.

Lynda's face fell in slight horror. "Sweetheart, no.. No, no, no.. Listen to me, nothing she ever did that hurt you was ever okay. She had no right to hurt you for any reason. Do you understand?" She was always so calm, he wanted to find comfort in that and not see it as a ruse.

Roman was quiet a second and nodded slowly. "I know.."

"You didn't deserve it." Lynda reached out to touch him, recoiling when he flinched before reaching back out again to softly stroke his cheek with her fingers before pulling away. "I'm not here to hurt you. I want to help. I won't hurt you, not you or Shelley or Letha."

Roman was quiet again. "I am sorry." He then turned and walked away.

Lynda sighed. She was trying. She had almost made progress.. Well, a little progress at least. Roman had apologized. She couldn't imagine hurting the boy for telling her a small fib that a lot of kids would tell to get out of doing dishes. She also didn't expect him to just trust her so soon. It would take time to heal wounds that deep.

\--xx--

The kitchen was occupied with Letha gleefully helping Lynda cook dinner- which was good, she usually helped her mom, and thanks to his mom, Letha no longer had a mom. So, Roman had to get creative if he wanted to continue watching Peter do yard work. And 'creative' just meant slinking around the side of the house and watching him by peering around the corner, trying to stay hidden the best as possible. One wouldn't catch Roman admitting to thinking that Peter made raking cut grass a work of art. Nope, he wasn't thinking that at all as he lit a cigarette he had. It wasn't easy for a sixteen year old to get cigarettes, but this store clerk by the name of Jenny Fredricks would sell them to him, all he'd have to do was smile and flirt a little. He wasn't exactly into her like that, but it worked. Hell, she probably wasn't actually into a damn sixteen year old either, as she was twenty-one. She was most likely just being nice to him since everyone knew that his mother was the devil- which was an insult to the devil.

He took a slow satisfying drag off the filter and blew it out away from the edge he was peeping around. Peter and Norman were busy, they wouldn't see him, they weren't even paying attention to him or his location. Peter was sweaty, a few blades of grass stuck to him. He raked grass like he personally hated it, with too much muscle and determination. It was odd how angrily he swiped the rake out, dropping it down too harshly on the ground and dragging it back hard, repeating until he had a pile. He'd then scoop it up and put it into a bag Norman would hold open. It was also amusing to watch him tie the bags off and lift them so easily to sit down somewhere so they could be loaded and taken off later.

Norman was talking to Peter and he nodded before Norman headed inside through the kitchen's door. It was then Peter turned his gaze and attention to Roman.

Roman had been mid-drag and nearly choked when he was spotted, especially since he hadn't expected it. He lowered the cigarette from his lips and dropped his arm down back behind his back to hide it, though not exactly hiding it well.

"And what are you doing spying on people?" Peter wasn't angry, just annoyed as he stalked over to Roman. It wasn't Roman he was annoyed at, however. "If you're gonna spy on people actually working, then you can help them work."

"Fuck off.." Roman muttered.

"What've you got behind your back?" Peter nodded towards him and Roman slowly brought his hand back around to take another drag on the cigarette. "Can I get a hit of that?"

Roman shrugged and handed over the cigarette for Peter to take the final drag.

"Thanks. Well, come on." Peter tossed the butt down and stomped it out. "You can help out." He motioned for him, but Roman wouldn't budge. So Peter grabbed his arm and tried to tug him along, only for Roman to jerk away violently. Peter put his hands up in defence and backed off. "Sorry."

"You've avoided me all day and now you want me to do yard work?" Roman snapped.

"Yeah. And yeah, I got a lot of shit on my mind. It's not like you want me around anyway." Peter shrugged.

"I don't not want you around." Roman sighed. "You just pissed me off yesterday. I got a lot on my mind too."

"Yeah, well, this gruelling shit will take your mind off of it for awhile." Peter again motioned for him to follow.

"No, I don't want to." Roman protested.

"Yeah, come on." Peter smirked and suddenly Roman wanted to follow him anywhere.. but not to do fucking yard work.

"No." He tried more firmly.

"Yeah, come on. Let's go, pretty boy, get your hands dirty." Peter grabbed his sleeve and pulled him along, managing to get him to follow this time. "You're gonna spy on people like a damn creep, you're gonna do work. It'll be your punishment." Of course Peter had only been playful and teasing.. He wasn't angry or upset or anything.

But Roman suddenly froze and the color seemed to drain from him. Certain words and phrases triggered certain feelings and memories. They sent him to places he'd rather not go. There was this horrible sinking feeling as his heart dropped to his stomach.

Roman tugged himself free harshly. "No.. You can't.. No!"

Peter had also froze, worried for a second and so confused. "Can't what? Roman..? I.. uh.. What is it?"

"Leave me alone. You're not allowed." Roman growled and shook his head before rushing into the house and through the kitchen, heading up to his room.

"Allowed to do what?" Peter followed behind him. "Roman..? Shit.. What did I do?" He called after him uselessly, stopping in the kitchen. He was so lost right now. It seemed he couldn't say or do anything right when it came to the other boy.

Both Lynda and Letha looked concerned. "Peter, what happened?" His mom asked.

"I don't know.. I was just teasing him, telling him he was going to do work since he was spying on me." Peter scratched his head. "He freaked out. I wasn't seriously going to make him."

"What did you say to him?" Letha asked.

"I told him it was his punishment. I was only joking." Peter suddenly grew apprehensive. "What did I do?"

"Peter, you just can't joke like that with him." Letha said. "I'm gonna go check on him. I'll be right back." She wiped her hands on a dish towel before laying it on the back of a chair and following after her cousin/half brother.

"Honey, there's certain things you can't say to him. Remember what we talked about?" Lynda reminded him gently.

"I said I was going to punish him.. Shit.. I wasn't thinking, I didn't think he would panic like that over that. I wasn't serious, I wouldn't actually hurt him.." Peter ran a hand over his mouth. "That's not even the way I meant it, I swear."

"It's okay, sweetie. It's gonna take time." Lynda sighed, patting her son on the shoulder. "You didn't know."

Roman had shut and locked the door, heading straight to his night table and opening the drawer to grab his box. He had to make the voices stop. So many voices.

'See, I told you, I fucking told you, they'll be just like her.'

'No, that's silly. He was only playing. He's not her, he wouldn't.. He's not even allowed to..'

'Allowed to or not, he still could get violent..'

'She was right, you are pathetic, freaking out over one little word.'

'No, no, no.. Shut up, shut up, shut up..'

Roman knew that it was silly panicking over something so small and stupid. It was fucking stupid. Peter hadn't even been serious, he had been teasing when he said it, his demeanor playful, and not hateful or mean.. But still, as soon as he said it, Roman found himself flashing back to a memory of Olivia in a more venomous tone telling him to take his punishment. Suddenly, it wasn't Peter's smiling face, it was Olivia's twisted and scornful bullshit back to haunt him. It wasn't that he was afraid of Peter. No, he wasn't afraid of Peter.. That was ridiculous, Peter was his same age, he wasn't allowed to actually punish him. It's just, in that instance, Peter had become Olivia in his fucked-up mind and he had to get away.

He didn't want to be afraid of Peter. He wanted to get close to Peter, and that admission scared the shit out of him.

He realized that he had handled that wrong. As always, he was a fuckup and couldn't do anything right. Now Peter probably thought he was retarded.. or a freak.. or both.

Roman jumped as someone started knocking on his door. He stilled and closed his eyes, hands still on the box as he debated about making another within the past 12 hours. Shelley would be upset. No matter how much he tried to keep it from her, she always knew. He breathed slowly and moved one hand back to his thigh to press fingers against the other cut, letting the slight sting morbidly soothe him.

"Roman, open up, it's me.." Letha said on the other side. "Peter was just joking, sweetie, people do that. He wouldn't hurt you.. And I'd not let him, even if he wanted to."

Roman looked at the closed door and back to the box. 'Just one more..'

"Roman, please.. Let me in.. It's okay.. She's in jail, where she belongs." Letha said bitterly. Olivia had been the one to take her mom away.

Roman closed the drawer and got up slowly, going to the door and opening it.

Letha immediately pulled him into a tight hug. "It's okay.. He didn't know.."

"I'm fine, really. I just.. I just didn't want to do his stupid work." Roman said, hugging her back.

Letha pulled back a bit. "You don't have to do that. Not with me."

"I said I'm okay. I mean it. It's fine. Just call me when dinner's ready, okay." Roman nodded.

Letha hugged him again, sighing. "Okay, I'll be right down there." She reluctantly left.

Roman didn't cut again, but oh, how he wanted to.

Peter avoided his gaze for most of dinner and him for the rest of the night. It wasn't like he was being snobby about it, he just seemed kind of shameful, like a kicked puppy. Roman also hated to admit that that was cute, and hated to admit that he was kind of glad that Peter seemed contrite about it.

Roman snuck outside after everyone was in bed to have a smoke and look at the stars. He could do that easily by crawling out his window and onto the roof of the garage. He had just lit the cigarette when Peter's bedroom window opened and he crawled out, having to balance himself a little more to get to the roof, but doing so with little effort.

Peter sat down beside him and nodded over to his cigarette. "Hey, can I bum one of those?"

Roman shrugged and handed Peter a cigarette and the lighter before sitting back and taking a drag of his own. He'd rather just sit by himself in quiet, but he didn't totally hate Peter being out here, and that concerned him.

"Um.. I'm sorry about earlier.. I just.. You know.." Peter didn't want to say the wrong thing and make it seem like he was patronizing Roman.

Roman shook his head. "It's fine. I shouldn't have freaked out, it was dumb."

Peter smoked in silence with him for awhile, watching him for a bit. "How bad was it?"

Roman startled at the question. He could deflect from it, act like it wasn't that bad, or that he wasn't just some pussy who couldn't handle it. But he just shook his head.

"Roman, talk to me.. I'm not here to judge you or make fun of you. I want to know." Peter urged.

"It was bad. She was bad. She'd get so bad. That's all you need to know." Roman told him.

Peter nodded. He wasn't sure he wanted details. "I'm, um.. I'm here if you need to talk.. I don't know how much help I'd be, but I can listen."

Roman shrugged. "Whatever. It's nothing."

"It isn't nothing. I said I wouldn't judge her for marrying your daddy for money, but I'm damn sure judging her for what she did to you and Shelley. For what she did to Letha and Norman too. She had no right." Peter said.

"Yeah, well, she's where she belongs, then. Isn't she?" Roman sighed and stamped out his cigarette before lighting another.

"Yeah, she is." Peter agreed and took another cigarette when it was offered to him and crushed out his spent one before lighting it.

Roman watched him for a bit as he watched the stars. It was beautiful out tonight. When Peter looked back at him, Roman reached out to pick a piece of lint out of his hair, taking a moment to first run his fingers through his shaggy dark hair, using it as an excuse to touch his hair. He didn't know why, but he just felt like doing it. He plucked out the lint and flicked it away. "You had some fuzz." He smiled.

Peter had closed his eyes, enjoying the slight feel of Roman's fingers in his hair, wishing he could ask for more of it. He swallowed and opened his eyes, staring at Roman's lips as they twitched into the tiniest of smirks. He just wanted to grab the other boy by the back of the neck and drag him closer to crush his lips against his. He wanted to kiss him until he was breathless and forgot all about Olivia Godfrey and everything else bad. With the soft breeze blowing, Peter could smell him. Roman smelled wonderful. How could any human smell that good? Peter knew it would probably be creepy to tell him so. It'd be even creepier to bury his face in Roman's neck and breathe him in, but that's what he wanted to do. Hell, he just wanted to be close to him. He didn't know why he felt that way, he just did, like right here with Roman, or wherever Roman was, was where Peter belonged.

"Peter..?" Roman's voice suddenly got his attention away from where he was staring at his neck and drew it back to his face. He wished it hadn't as Roman licked his lips, wetting them with a pink tongue. All that did was inspire naughty thoughts. Such a simple act that people did all the time looked like porn when Roman did it, those lips should be illegal. Suddenly he could imagine Roman sucking on a lollipop or a popsicle and his dick twitched, waking up, all the blood preparing to travel south. Oh, shit.. "Peter..?" He tried again, face growing concerned.

"Um, yeah..?" Peter managed, attempting to come back to his senses.

"Your cigarette is burning down." Roman said simply, plump lips wrapping around the filter of his own to take a long drag before blowing a tendril of smoke through those luscious lips. Imagine them around something else.. Something bigger and harder..

Peter forced himself to look down at his cigarette and took a deep drag of it, inhaling the smoke for a moment before releasing it. He then stamped the cigarette out and flicked it away. "It's, uh.. It's late.. I need to get in bed. So do you." Peter rose up in a way that hopefully hid anything should Roman see it.

"Oh.. Okay.. Yeah, you're probably right." Roman agreed, though Peter would swear he looked a bit crushed. Peter also knew that wasn't possible. Roman actually wanting Peter's time? Yeah, right..

"Goodnight." Peter said, heading back towards his window.

"Night." Roman nodded, continuing to smoke.

Peter quickly got inside, shut and locked the window and closed the curtains as much as possible. He made it to his bed, clawing at his pants to get to his dick. He jerked off thinking about those stupid fucking lips wrapped around his cock instead of his fist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angst. For me, certain words or phrases can often trigger flashbacks and lead to panic attacks. It sometimes seems silly any other time, but during it just feels such a horrible helpless feeling. Roman and Peter will get closer.


	5. Awkward Feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter and Roman have an awkward conversation about sexuality. And the Godfrey children get to meet Destiny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts of Roman dressed as a slutty schoolgirl and what Peter fantasizes about doing to him. Oops.

Peter continued to help Roman with his homework, whether the other boy wanted him to or not. And Roman continued to be a smartass about it.

"You know, you'd make a really good teacher." Roman interrupted as they sat at the kitchen table. "I mean it. We could get you a nice suit, comb back your hair, trim that scruff, clean you up. At least then you'd look the part."

"Okay then, we'll get you a little matching schoolgirl outfit." Peter countered. He could just imagine it; a short red plaid skirt, a white button down shirt with the ends tied above his belly button, the sleeves rolled up, some white tights that come up to his thighs and black Mary Jane type buckled shoes. "You could grow out your hair for pigtails.. Or we'll just get you a wig with pigtails.." Peter grinned as Roman flushed viciously and pouted hard, folding his arms.

"So, you like imagining me as a slutty schoolgirl? Would you want to see me after class for extra credit too?" Roman shot back, lowering his arms.

"Let's just get back to math right now." Peter so wasn't going to jerk off tonight to fantasies of that. He wasn't.. Okay, he totally was, but so what?

"Or are you just making fun of me?" Roman said lowly.

"What? No. Teasing, maybe. Hey, you got the legs for it." Peter smiled and Roman felt queasy.

"You are making fun of me. That's rude." Roman sat back in his chair, dropping his pen on the opened math textbook. "You're just insulting me by saying I should dress up like a girl."

"No, I'm not. Hey, there's nothing wrong with dressing like a girl, or dudes dressing in drag, okay. I didn't say it as an insult. Plenty of dudes crossdress." Peter said. Even some real burly manly dudes crossdressed. They'd keep their facial hair and everything, but just liked to wear makeup and shit. It's pretty awesome.

"Wouldn't that make them gay?" Roman inquired, seeming almost timid to ask.

"Well, not always. I mean, if they're gay then they're gay, there's nothing wrong with that, it's just who they are. But just because someone crossdresses doesn't make them gay, even straight dudes can crossdress and be androgynous." Peter explained. He felt he had to so Roman wouldn't think he thought that a guy in drag was an insult just because he said something about Roman dressed as a damn schoolgirl. He really wasn't insulting him.

"But you think I'd look good in drag?" Roman asked carefully, raising an eyebrow. Neither him nor Peter knew why they were having this conversation.. Maybe Roman just had to see what his feelings were on it.

Peter shrugged. "I don't know. You still look good in your, uh, suits.. You remind me of one of those androgynous models, you know, with your hair and your lips. They're girls, but they look like the prettiest boys." There were also boys who looked like the prettiest girls.

Roman had got his phone out and looked up what Peter was talking about on an image search. Okay, he did kind of look like a couple of those girls. Some of those particular models had their hair shorter in the back, with long bangs up front, slicked back, but also falling loose, full pouted lips and pretty, yet boyish faces. They were honestly gorgeous. Did Peter see him that way? As pretty?

"You think I look like a girl who looks like a boy?" Roman blinked, baiting.

"Well, uh, not as an insult. I mean, you're a gor-great l-looking guy.. I'm jealous and shit, is all.." Peter had became all flustered now, rubbing the back of his neck as he looked anywhere but Roman. He seemed nervous now. Roman again hated to admit that that was cute.

Roman straightened up in his chair, getting Peter's attention as the chair squeaked. He cleared his throat, keeping his eyes on his phone, watching Peter out of his peripheral vision. He pouted his lips and reached up to push his own bangs back as pieces of them had came loose with splayed fingers, he batted his eyelashes. "I guess I can see what you mean. Don't worry, I'm not insulted. They're gorgeous."

"Yeah.. Kind of like a bisexual's dream, right?" Or a pansexual's, either way. Peter was watching Roman pretend to preen, and it was ridiculously adorable.

Roman suddenly blinked and turned his gaze back to Peter. "Are you.. um..? I mean, uh.."

"What? Am I really what Seth said I was?" Peter finished.

"I wasn't going to put it the way he did. But are you.. gay?" Roman asked.

"I think I'm bi." Peter shrugged. "Does that bother you?"

"No, why should it? Have you.. had any ex-experience with guys?" Roman asked with a sigh, like it took effort to ask. Which it probably had since he felt this strange anxiety in his stomach.

"Yeah, some.. Nothing too heavy.." Peter replied.

Roman's heart was fluttering in his chest. He didn't know what he was doing. It's just, he felt a little more comfortable talking to Peter about this, about things he'd dare not discuss with anyone else. Shelley was too young. He came close to talking to Letha once, close to admitting to her that he might like guys, but he chickened out. It's not like Letha would ever love him any less though. He could have never talked about this with his mother, and she'd be horrified to learn that he was even interested. And he wasn't comfortable talking to Norman yet.

Roman wet his lips. "Would it offend you if I asked what?" Did he want to know? There was also a strange feeling bubbling up in his throat, it couldn't be jealousy.

"You told me it was none of my business when I asked you." Peter reminded.

Roman suddenly looked confused. "When you asked me what?"

"When I asked you if anyone had got to fuck the rich boy." Peter clarified.

"Oh.. yeah, I'm sorry about that." Roman looked back down and found the numbered problems on the page of the textbook fascinating.

"You answer my question, I'll answer yours." Peter challenged.

"No." Roman said it quickly, flushing.

"No, you won't answer my question?" Peter prodded him lightly in the side.

Roman squirmed. "No, nobody's got to fuck the rich boy." His face reddened further. "I'm a virgin, are you happy?" He glared at Peter, whose look had softened.

"You're only sixteen, dude, you have plenty of time. Just cuz Seth's probably fucked half the school, doesn't mean you have to, and it doesn't mean you have to be one of his conquests." Peter reached over to place a hand on his shoulder and gave a light squeeze, noticing that Roman had relaxed significantly. He moved his hand off his shoulder. "Some kissing, some heavy petting. That's about it. Nothing salacious or special. I don't even remember those people. I don't even think I got their names."

"Do you think I'm gay? Do I give off any vibes that I am?" Roman asked, swallowing his heart as it threatened to come up into his throat.

"Cuz I said you reminded me of those girls? Come on, effeminate doesn't always mean gay, but it's totally alright if it does. Same with straight doesn't always fucking mean masculine. You are what the fuck you are, who the fuck you are. I don't even see you as that feminine." Peter explained. "It's alright if you are gay though. It's alright if you're not."

"I think I might like boys." There. Roman just spit it out. "I mean, not like Seth, or anything. There was this guy, Ricky. He's on the wrestling team. I had a little crush on him. But I've never even talked to him."

Peter swallowed down his own jealousy. "Is he pretty?"

"Y-yeah.. But, uh, I've never done anything with anyone to know for sure." Roman kept his eyes on the math page, he was pretty sure he'd know its layout by heart before this was over. He had already solved several in his head.

"It's okay, like I said, you have plenty of time." Peter wanted to just take his head in his hands and kiss him stupid, make him not question anything anymore, and question everything at the same time. He wanted to touch him anywhere, hold him, bury his face in his neck and breathe him in. Instead he patted him on the back. "Come on, let's get this done. Then we can go play video games and I can kick your ass that way."

Roman smiled and nodded. He could talk to Peter. Peter wouldn't judge him. Peter was smart, Peter knew shit.

\--xx--

Later Peter did jerk off to fantasies of Roman dressed as a slutty schoolgirl. He thought of bending him over a teacher's desk, pulling the short red plaid skirt up. He'd be wearing tight silk white panties with lace around the edges that hugged his lovely ass perfectly. And Peter would just pull them aside to expose his ass and get to his hole, leaving his cock trapped in the panties. He enjoyed thinking about working Roman open with his fingers, how tight he'd be. Fuck, he was a virgin, and something inside of Peter was excited to think about popping his cherry. Claiming him. He'd be so tight, so hot and good on his cock, he could only imagine. The sounds Roman would make. He could imagine how wet the panties would be where Roman's cock would be leaking inside them, Peter could rub his dick through them and make him cum inside them, ruining them.

That was really all it took to make Peter cum inside his own underwear.

He should feel more ashamed, thinking about his stepbrother like that, but he didn't. Roman wasn't his biological brother, they weren't related, and he wasn't seeing him as brotherly at all. Also it was just a fantasy. Honestly, there would probably never be any acting on it. Okay, Peter was basically a virgin too, but he doubted Roman had ever even been kissed. And Peter at least allowed himself to jerk off to fantasies, he was a teenage boy, but he didn't think Roman did that either.

\--xx--

Peter continued to join Roman out on the roof of a night to smoke and talk. Roman had gotten to where he stayed close to Peter in school, as close as he could. It was keeping Seth away from him anyhow. Seth would spot them, glare and give dirty looks, flip them off, or spit on the ground, not exactly in their general direction, but the rude sentiment was implied. Peter would glare right back at Seth, even though Roman wouldn't look at or acknowledge Seth or his friends at all. Something inside of Peter secretly wanted to convey that Roman was his, and Seth better stay out of his fucking territory and leave them both alone.

Roman had eased up on Lynda. Though he still wasn't ready to call her mom, or consider her an official stepmother. But he wanted to keep the peace for Shelley (who needed love and affection from a mother figure) and Letha (Lynda wouldn't replace her mother, but she wasn't trying to.) Lynda would still try to talk to him and engage him, but Roman would only politely pretend to listen and excuse himself. He also didn't want to upset Peter, he didn't want Peter mad at him for some reason. He still just wasn't able to trust her yet, he might never be able to.

Roman watched as Lynda combed and braided Shelley's hair in the living room. Making her even prettier.

Norman had came up to him and spoke quietly. "I hate to relay this message to you, Roman, but your mother wants you to visit her one day."

Roman shook his head. "Do I have to?"

"No, you don't have to. I wouldn't make you. It isn't my place. It would be completely up to you." Norman reached out to stroke his hair, and Roman only flinched a little bit.

But that touch hurt, it hurt as bad as being struck, because it was so gentle. Roman hated how nice it felt. He wanted to nuzzle into it, eat up the affection like Shelley and Letha did. But he remained still, feeling strangely kind of sad when the hand went away.

Shelley giggled as she looked into a handheld mirror before typing. "It's so pretty."

"You are very pretty." Lynda said.

\--xx--

That weekend they got to meet Destiny, Peter's cousin. They acted like brother and sister, shoving playfully at each other and snarking teasingly at each other. Destiny was nice to Shelley and to Letha, she asked to see their palms and said she could read them, she could read people.

Shelley was amused and delighted by her, and was happy when Destiny told her how bright she was, that she was very important and would one day help others and change the world, or at least Hemlock Grove. If anything maybe she thought it'd be good motivation to do good things in her future. Destiny told Letha how intelligent she was and how far that would take her in her chosen field, that she'd be innovative and top of her class. These were all things Roman already knew without having to be psychic.

"And you must be Roman." Destiny smiled.

He was startled when she asked to see his palms. "What? I.."

"Go on, she won't bite you." Peter urged.

Roman reluctantly turned his hands over and let her see his palms. Destiny noticed with interest how Roman seemed to relax when Peter placed a hand on his shoulder. Destiny's features were confusing as she studied him. Roman watched as they showed contrite and sadness, then fear and longing. She swallowed and stepped away before looking up at Peter, then back at Roman and wetting her lips.

"I'm so sorry, Roman. Your troubles are not yet over, but then again, no one's ever are. The path you choose to take and the decisions you make will make a world of difference in the outcome of your journey." She smiled gently again and clasped his hands with her own. "You're okay here." She then released his hands and walked away.

"She's strange, I know. But she can see things others can't." Peter said. "But she's so damn cryptic about it."

Roman felt strange about it.

The girls were soon busy bonding over that show Shelley and Letha liked. Roman watched it with more interest than he wanted to. So, it wasn't bad, it was interesting and looked awesome. And had three gorgeous guys fighting monsters and demons, being all badass and shit.

"So, are Dean and Cas together? They seem like they're an old married couple." Roman asked Peter, who shrugged.

Letha giggled. "They are an old married couple. But they're not yet, the writers are too chicken shit to put them together officially. But they're in love, a blind man can see it." She explained. "Even people who don't watch the show regularly think they're in love."

"You'd have to blind to not see it, I guess." Destiny said. "Either they're in love, or the actors are in love. I mean, do you see the way they look at each other? I wish someone would look at me the way Dean looks at Cas." She sighed kind of dreamily. Because really, who doesn't want someone to look at them the way Dean looks at Cas?

Roman thought Cas had to be an idiot, because if he was Cas, he'd be sitting in Dean's lap, calling him Daddy. Roman blushed at that thought, having no idea where it had came from. He was glad he hadn't said it out loud and snuggled down into his chair.

Destiny pulled Peter aside later, out of Roman's earshot. "Be careful with that boy."

"I don't know what you mean, Dee. I'm always careful." He grinned.

"Bullfuckingshit." She snorted. "And I'm not stupid, I see the way you look at him. I'm just saying that he's very fragile, very broken."

"Yeah, I know." Peter sighed.

"Peter, there's something else about him. Something I can't see yet. Something dark lurking beneath his skin, embedded into his DNA. It's only now starting to manifest." Destiny said seriously. "Just be careful." She hugged him before she left.

Peter honestly didn't know what to make of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm personally becoming less happy with this fic. It's making me frustrated. It's just writing practice at this point. I love those androgynous models, and my sexuality is kind of all over the place. Basically it's just an awkward teenage conversation about sexuality. I also love Supernatural and ship Dean and Cas. I did have them be 15, but I changed it to 16.


	6. Altercation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter has to go away for a couple of days, leaving Roman defenseless against Seth and his lackeys. This leads to him being attacked in the locker room, and saved by four members of the wrestling team, one of whom he has a little crush on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, um, there's violence, and attempted rape, which doesn't actually get far.

Roman didn't know how he felt about it, Peter and Lynda packed up to go stay a couple of nights at some relative's house. It seemed weird, but Norman wasn't concerned and told them to be careful and he'd see them in a day or so.

It was just for a night or two, and it should be no big deal, but it was so strange. He didn't even figure they had other family to stay with, which was silly.

Still Roman dreaded going to school without Peter. He felt this might be the day that Seth made a move. He became increasingly more sure of that as the school day went on, noticing all the predatory looks Seth would give him in the halls, or at lunch. And whenever he saw Roman looking, Seth would snap his teeth at him or lick his lips suggestively. Roman didn't like that and it gave him the creeps.

Going back after a book at the end of the day was his biggest mistake, but he had swore he had saw Seth and his goons leave the school already. But when he rounded the corner to go down the hallway to his locker, there they were, laying in wait like a pack of hungry dogs.

"Your ass is mine, Godfrey. Your little boyfriend's not around today, no one to interrupt us." Seth said, stalking towards him, Jesse and Dirk in tow.

Roman turned and ran, he ran as fast as he fucking could, dropping his bookbag in the process. Fuck the book, fuck this. He made it to the locker room where the wrestling team changed, hoping someone would still be there and hoping that Seth would abort his mission.

No one was there and he was trapped, especially when he was caught, grabbed and shoved into the lockers.

Seth tightened fingers in his shirt, holding him against the lockers. He pulled Roman away from them only to slam him into them again. He repeated this a couple of times, before grabbing his hair and giving his head the same treatment.

Seth panted heatedly. "Fucking bitch, think you can run from me? Huh? Got no one to protect you today, you're all mine. Now, this can go two ways." He grabbed Roman by the face and growled. "I'll give you a chance to make this real easy on yourself. You can get on your knees and suck my dick like a good slut, and I promise I'll open you up before I fuck you, I'll even fuck you real gently, break you in real slow. I'll even let you cum on my dick.. Or you can keep refusing and I'll just bend you over this bench and shove my cock in your ass dry. It's your choice."

Roman struggled with him a bit to Seth's amusement. The bully only laughed and held him against the lockers, shoving a knee between his legs and rubbing it against his crotch. "Fuck, no.. No, fuck you.. I'm not your whore." He even spit in Seth's face.

And the slap that followed was so hard it made Roman's ears ring as pain exploded behind his eyes and in his cheek.

Seth grabbed his hair. "Have it your way, we're gonna take turns with your ass, you're not gonna be walking out of here when we're done."

Roman was panicking as Seth undid his pants. "No, no, no.. Please no.." He continued on a loop, actually frightened as he was shoved to his knees and forced over the bench.

The other two were advancing on him, staring at him like they were hungry hyenas, and he was a lost and alone lion cub. Dirk and Jesse held Roman down as he struggled, Seth behind him. He heard a zipper come down and his heart pounded. This was happening. It was really happening this time, not just toying, not just threats, they were seriously going to rape him this time. Peter had pissed Seth off big time, and Roman was going to pay for it.

There was no one here to save him this time, Peter wasn't here. Why couldn't Peter be here? His mother could have went alone to see relatives for whatever fucking reason, why did Peter have to fucking go with her?

He felt a hand move under his shirt, fingers caressing his back and back down his side, touching him, reaching around to trail fingers across his stomach before groping his crotch and squeezing.

"Stop it! Let me go!" Roman shouted it. He had heard others be told that if they were being raped to scream as much as they could and make their intentions clear that they did not want it, maybe attract attention to the situation, and not let anyone say that they didn't tell them to stop or that they didn't want it. "Stop!" It came out as an embarrassing whine and he was on the verge of crying.

Seth's hand retreated to his back and slipped down the back of his pants into his underwear, fingers slipping between his cheeks. Roman was hyperventilating now, especially as one finger touched his hole, pushing against it. He did not want to lose his virginity this way.

"No! Please stop!" Roman felt the hand withdraw, but then the sides of his pants were grabbed. He shut his eyes tight. It didn't matter, it was happening.

"What the hell?!" Another voice, not the three bullies. "What the fuck are you doing to him?! Let him go!" Not Peter. He knew that voice.

Jesse and Dirk released him and backed away as Seth was yanked off of him and shoved away violently.

"This is none of your business, Irvine! He's mine, and I'm gonna do what I want with him." Seth growled.

"Yeah, well, it doesn't look like he fucking wants anything to do with you, shithead." Ricky snarled back at him.

Roman had backed away into a corner to sit with his back against the wall, tucking his knees up and locking his arms around them, he buried his head in his arms. Great, his crush had to see him like that. At least someone came to stop it.

"Bitch wants it, he's just playing hard to get. And I'm tired of his goddamn games." Seth spat.

"It doesn't look like he's playing games, you sick sonofabitch. In fact, I specifically heard him tell you to stop. What you're doing is rape, it's against the law." Ricky reminded.

"Like he'd tell anyone." Seth laughed.

Ricky growled again. "Leave him alone. I catch you anywhere near him again and I'm gonna break every bone in your face."

Dirk and Jesse mainly kept their bay because three more wrestlers stepped out, bigger than them. Ricky had back up. Roman peeped out to see who. He recognized James Raylan, Dorian Gates, and Trent Walker.

"Hey, this doesn't have to be this way. We'll share, all take turns. You know he likes you, bet he'd love to ride your dick. I just want him first." Seth negotiated.

Ricky snarled. "You're sick. I'm nothing like you."

"You're just still pissed cuz I fucked your sister." Seth's laugh was cut off when Ricky punched him in the face. Roman's pretty sure Seth's nose exploded on impact, because there was so much blood. Dirk and Jesse fucking ran when James, Dorian and Trent made a move towards them, leaving Seth. "Son of a bitch! You motherfucker."

Seth groaned as he was shoved into the lockers none too gently. At sixteen Ricky was already all muscle. He landed another hit to Seth's guts that dropped the bully to his knees, wheezing and coughing.

"Get the fuck out of my locker room, I don't want to catch you in here again, especially not doing what you were gonna do." Ricky spit at him.

Dirk and Jesse came back only to drag their leader out. "You'll pay for this, wait and see." Seth promised.

"Anytime you wanna go, Mosley. Bring it." Ricky was then stepping closer to Roman, crouching down to check on him. "Hey, you alright?"

Roman nodded and wiped at the tears on his face. He hadn't even realized he'd been crying.

"It's Roman, right? I have you in a few of my classes. I'm Ricky, you probably already know that." Ricky smiled and Roman felt queasy again. Okay, maybe he still had a little crush. Ricky was then picking up a small towel, sniffing it to ensure it was clean before wiping Roman's face. "That guy's a dick."

Roman winced when he touched where he had been slapped and Ricky tensed. Roman's heart fluttered at the treatment, being taken care of by this ridiculously good looking boy. Ricky was tall, had shaggy tousled blond hair and steely blue eyes, he was boyishly handsome.

"Sorry. Come on, let's get you out of the floor and get you home." Ricky helped him up and let him fix his pants, politely looking away.

Ricky drove him home after he got his book out of the classroom, the book that almost got him raped, and the bookbag he had dropped in the chase. Ricky already had a car. Roman had a car too waiting for him, it had been his dad's, JR's. Norman was saving it for when he could drive. Roman was quiet on the way home and Ricky didn't press him about anything that happened. Ricky walked him to the door, even carried his bookbag like a gentleman. Usually Roman would have refused, definitely if it was Peter, not wanting to feel helpless. But right now, Roman was just numb.

It kept replaying in his head, the attack, what almost happened. What would have happened had Ricky and his friends hadn't been there to interrupt it.

Norman was in the living room when he came in, Ricky behind him. He was on his laptop and looked up when Roman entered, seeing how red the side of his face was, how shaken he appeared to be. "Roman, what happened? Are you okay?" He sat the laptop aside and got up, stepping towards the boys.

"Just peachy. This is Ricky. He's in a few of my classes." Roman gestured back to the boy, who seemed out of place. "This is Norman."

Ricky nodded. "Hi."

"Nice to meet you." Norman nodded back and turned his attention to Roman. "Did you get into a fight?" He asked, concern written all over his face.

"You could say that. Kinda one-sided though. I walked into a locker. I don't want to talk about it." Roman said quietly.

Letha had came down, already home and probably already finished with homework. "Roman, oh my gosh, what happened?" She closed in on him and reached up to inspect his face. "Who did this?"

"Seth Mosley." Roman shook her off. "I'm fine."

"Ricky, what happened?" Letha asked the other boy.

Ricky rubbed the back of his neck. "Just a nasty altercation. I got there in time to stop it. Don't worry."

"Who is this Seth Mosley?" Norman asked.

"Just an asshole." Roman snapped.

"He's a football player who thinks he can screw people over without consequence. He's a bully." Letha said.

"Yeah, well, I'm not going to let him get away with this." Norman folded his arms.

"It's none of your business. You'll just make it worse. Peter tried to stand up to him for me, and he left me alone until Peter was gone. Him and his two lackeys jumped me, dragged me into the locker room and.." Roman stopped and took a breath. He could feel Ricky watching him, waiting to see if he told the truth of what was really happening in the locker room. "Just leave it alone. He just slapped me, is all."

Roman appreciated Ricky keeping his mouth shut. Ricky gazed down at the floor, it really wasn't his place to tell.

Norman sighed. "I just want to help you and keep you safe."

'Not like you could keep me safe today.' Roman thought bitterly.

"Roman, listen to him. We don't want anything to happen to you. I don't want anything to happen to you. Shelley doesn't want anything to happen to you." Letha told him, patting him on the arm. "Peter wouldn't either."

Roman's eyes darkened at Peter's name. Yeah, well, Peter hadn't been there to protect him, or even just scare Seth off as usual. Peter wasn't fucking here. But he didn't say anything and turned to Ricky. "Thank you for being there. I do appreciate it."

Norman and Letha dropped it for now, Roman may not want to talk in front of Ricky. Norman offered Ricky something to drink, but he declined, saying he had to get home.

Roman walked him out the door. "Thanks for not saying anything."

"It's not up to me if they know or not." Ricky gave him his number just in case he ever needed someone and left.

Roman just wanted to go to his bathroom and take a two hour shower.

That's what he did do, got the water as hot as he could stand it and let the spray wash away the memory. He scrubbed hard, so hard his skin hurt. He just wanted the feeling of Seth's hands off of him, especially between his cheeks. He felt like crying, but there was no use in falling apart, he knew it was coming eventually. At least Ricky had stopped it, at least he wasn't raped.

Roman ended up cutting again before he got out of the shower, letting the blood wash down the drain with the water. He rinsed everything away, the water now cold.

\--xx--

Lynda and Peter got back that night, Peter looking exhausted and tired. Shelley was happy they were back and Lynda took time to help her with her homework.

Roman wanted to be mad at Peter and blame him for what happened, but he didn't want to be either. He wanted to tell him, rub his face in it. Maybe just to see his reaction. He avoided Peter until dinner. Peter had noticed the slight bruise on his cheek, but waited to say anything. He waited until they were out on the roof smoking.

"Um, what happened to your face..?" He lifted Roman's chin up with his fingers to take a look. "Who the fuck did this?"

"I'll give you one fucking guess." Roman jerked away and took a drag, tapping the ashes away into the wind.

"Seth? What the fuck happened? What did he do to you?" Peter actually sounded angry as he crushed out his cigarette.

"He got me after school, chased me into the wrestler's locker room, slammed me into a locker and ran his mouth, hit me. He wanted.. he wanted.. um.." Roman gazed down at the roof under them.

"What? Tell me." Peter urged, tossing the rest of his spent cigarette away.

"You weren't there, so he thought he could get what he wanted. He tried. He almost succeeded." Roman told him, taking another long drag and letting it out slowly into the night air.

"Almost succeeded?" Peter appeared horrified. "He..?"

"He was going to fucking rape me, Peter. Him and his friends. He had me bent over the bench and he was groping me and touching me, he..his fingers.." Roman's face squished up like he was going to cry and was fighting it tooth and nail as he fought the memory of Seth touching him there. He shook his head and lowered it.

"Fuck. Roman, I'm sorry.. I didn't mean.. I didn't think he would actually.. I wouldn't have left if I could've, I.. Shit." Peter tugged at his hair, biting back a growl and wanting to rip Seth apart.

"It was going to happen sooner or later. Ricky and some other guys on the wrestling team interrupted him and stopped it. I'm okay, Peter, I just feel weird. I'm sorry." Roman sighed, stamping out his cigarette. He was a little shocked when Peter grabbed his hand and held it.

"It's not your fault." Peter's thumb rubbed back and forth across his knuckles. 'He touches you again, I'll kill him. I may just kill him anyway.'

Roman leaned over and rested his head on Peter's shoulder. "Why did you have to go?"

Peter couldn't tell him why. He had to go, there had been no getting out of it. "It's just something I had to do. I couldn't get out of it." Because he had to leave, Roman almost got hurt. He dreaded next month when he'd have to leave again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course Peter leaving was so he could change during the moon. Ricky is my creation, he was specifically created to defend Roman's honor when Peter can't.. Or well, he was actually specifically created to fuck Roman in Not Just Friends, but he pretty much becomes one of Roman's protectors. Ricky can and will beat the shit out of Seth. For the three wrestlers I used names for other characters I created. Ricky was given the last name of one of my favorite wrestlers/entertainers real last name.

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I said I wanted to do something like this, and here it is. The Norman/Lynda will not get graphic or heavy. I wanted to have Lynda be able to be a mother to Roman and Shelley, since they deserved better, and also have Norman be a father to Roman, and a stepfather to Peter. I started Peter and Roman at sixteen, and there will probably not be any sexual content at this age, but there may be time skips. There will be Romancek, and teasing. I also want to have Roman be a virgin, cuz I've yet to do it or have Peter take his virginity. I don't know if I want Peter to be a virgin or not. Naturally this is AU. Peter is still a werewolf, and Roman unknowingly half upir.


End file.
